Ethiopia: Abay River Shocked By All the Attention It is Getting, Demanded Apology [Satire]

[This is Satire News]

[GirumPost.com]

Abay also known as Nile river shocked by the national attention it is receiving from Ethiopians in the last one year.

This week, Ethiopians celebrated third year anniversary of Renaissance Dam which is being built on Abay river.

Abay river said “The other day I was chillin at home and watching TV. BAM, I saw myself on TV and all these musicians singing a love song for me. Ohhh....how sweet is that? I am being treated like a one year old baby.”

"Immediately after 20 hours of listening the best Ethiopian singers confessing their love for me, I start flipping channels ( I just want to use the word flip here to sound cool but...Poor ETV, It has only two channels. Ethiopians should see how many channels I get in Cairo.)

"Anyhoo,  the other ETV channel was showing Ethiopians buying bonds under my name from da bank.
A lot of people are spending shit load of money on Me!!! I love it. I Love it. I loooooove it."

Abay added "My friend, Mississippi river, told me that Ethiopians in U.S. love to talk about me. This is awesome, US Diaspora!!!”

Even though Abay is enjoying the moment, it expressed disappointment.

I would like to thank all Ethiopians for realising my potential but I have a question that I wanted to ask them for thousands of years.
“Where the f*** have you been all this time? What took you so long?”
"The only thing Ethiopians did for me is sing a retarded song. “Abay Abay Abay Abay, Yager Sisay.” "What about you apologize first before start singing a love song and build a dam on top me!”

Abay continued bitching on the current progress of the dam “What is three year celebration of Abay Dam?’. Stop the celebration and finish the damn dam as fast as you can. You can add two more on it. My people are ready to pour so much Birr on me!”

At the end of the interview Abay sounded like a thousand year old wise man than a bitch. “The reason Ethiopians didn’t notice my potential is the same reason they failed to see their own potential.”
That is Deep Abay. That is deep.

When Abay started bitching that Teddy Afro forgot to mention its name on the new Tikur Sew Album. “I listened every song. He didn’t say anything about me”...Our interviewer couldn’t handle Abay and left.

On related news, Kebene river threatened Addis Ababa Administration to sell bonds under its name or it will continue to be used as toilet for Addis Ababa residents.

Read More.

Views: 4283

Tags: Abay, All, Apology, Attention, By, Demanded, Getting, It’s, River, Shocked, More…the

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Comment by shiferaw gabre on July 2, 2013 at 3:56am

Like it has been said it needed some one with a talent and a time to be right both were available,then you are secured,we give thanks to the courageous man and the time given by the Almighty GOD !!!!

Comment by Girmay,Lili on August 11, 2012 at 11:00am

Abay, you are right, where the D????? we Ethiopian where????? that is true.... because, we were waiting for a WISE and PM like Melese Zenawi.... to think about it and make you use-full for the whole Africa not only Ethiopia. OK, if Tedy Afroye did NOT talk or say anything about you..... it is because, he doesn't care about Ethiopia or Ethiopian, he is just continue his propaganda to collect some money as he always does.... OK, and he has nothing up-there in his mind about thinking how Ethiopia can compete, develop in a positive way, you know what I want to say, he is just a JERK, you have to forget about him. Grow fast and be even more popular than you use to be ABAYE, We Ethiopian Loves you very much. Don't worry we will give every single pennies we have to make you USEFUL. Melse GET WELL SOON, and May God Help you to LIVE a LONG LIFE to SEE you Good Work.

Comment by Dagmawi Melaku Abegaz on April 22, 2012 at 1:41am

awesome news!! good points and funny as hell

u should write more of these type of news

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